Before...

So... yeah. I struggled with putting these photos up at all. One, because because the whole "before and after" thing just seems so vein. Especially once you get to "after", and not only are you in way better shape and oh my Gawd look how strong I am and I hope that kid Brooke Spindler who used to beat me up in middle school stumbles across this boy will he be sorry - but you're now the kind of person who thinks those things while getting a professional photo taken of yourself sporting a deep fried, golden-orange tan*. And two, because self-portraits in a body length mirror always look a myspace profile pic circa 2005, back when you only kinda knew everyone in your social network, and your spouse or significant other wasn't one of them.



And THREE, because I'm alternately vein and ridiculously self-conscious; because I think that under my draping shirt no one can ever see the tauntaun haunches that are packed on either side of my torso, because after my scoliosis test in the fifth grade, everyone joked that I needed to wear a bra. (Really, I can laugh about it now. No, I swear...)

But I've decided that if I'm really gonna do this, I'm gonna do it all the way. I'm gonna take a long, hard look at myself and be brutally honest about what I need to change, and track the progress on the way.

The trick for me is going be buckling up in the driver's seat, instead of sitting in the back whining "Are we there, yet?"

*though, admittedly, looking at my pictures, I could use some sun. Sheesh.